iSpy 00Seddie
by singingzombies
Summary: Ten years from the day that iCarly first aired. Tragedy had struck the Shays in the past. Sam has changed, and Freddie has changed even more. Action Sequences, Thrills, and Seddie are promised. Action Adventure iCarly fanfic! -SEDDIE
1. Prologue

**Summary: **Ten years from the day that iCarly first aired. Tragedy had struck the Shays in the past. Sam has changed, and Freddie has changed even more. Action Sequences, Thrills, and Seddie are promised. In a world where the action adventure genre and iCarly have been fused by a delusional fanfiction writer comes: iSpy 00-Seddie

**A/N: **My second fanfic, still working on Ruined Puzzle Pieces. The idea for this fic came out of a need to write a more action-oriented story and another iCarly fic and as ridiculous as it kept sounding to me, my imagination went wild and a story came out of nowhere, so for the good or better, let's get started:

**Disclaimer: **I don't own iCarly, if I did, I'd jump the shark and add too many Seddie moments

**Prologue**

_Today wasn't a good day. My entire team had been killed in the last hour in an operation that had been called in on false Intel. I was supposed to be only tech-support, but at the moment I am the last man standing, or driving to more accurate. Driving in my personally-designed XL-5000 sports-car with about 8 cars in pursuit in the middle of Poland in a small city called Chopin. Even worse still is that Sam is calling on my cell phone, a call I know I can't ignore because I have been freaking ignoring her calls all week and via her emails, I know that one more and I have would have to deal with Kingdom Come when I got home._

"Spencer, how do I get myself into these predicaments?" Freddie groaned as his cell-phone bleeped its second ring. That left about… four more seconds that he could ignore her.

A male-synthesized voice of Freddie's personal AI assistant emerged from the XL-5000's speakers, "Amalgam requested a Search and Destroy Mission in Chopin, Poland. Six field agents were required and you were brought in for your technical prowess and expertise with the SATA-300 Computer Systems utilized in the base defenses. Complications occurred when…"

"It was a rhetorical question, Spencer." Freddie explained as he suddenly heard the start of machine gun fire behind him. His back windshield started cracking and whittling and Freddie was reminded of the fact that even the best bulletproof glass could only last so long against persistent gunners. (And gunners were ALWAYS persistent…) Another ring, and Freddie allowed himself a sigh before answering his phone.

"Hey Sam, how's it going?" Freddie cradled the cell phone as he pulled a ninety-degree turn into the local city streets. One untalented pursuer fortunately couldn't follow and slammed into the corner taking out another car behind him. Six cars left…

"FREDDIE! Where the hell have you been? The contract for the apartment has to be signed TOMORROW! We need you here." Sam voice even through horrible interference was still indistinguishable. "The interference is horrible by the way. Where are you?"

"Chopin" Freddie said reflexively before mentally kicking himself. As an intelligence operative Freddie should have been better at the whole lying thing but 3 years of training as a spy apparently was no match for a lifetime of being forced to tell Sam everything.

"Shopping? Where? At the mall? That makes sense, I can barely hear you and I remember how ridiculous reception and noise are in those stores."

"Warning, RPGs and anti-tank guns detected," Spencer droned in.

"$*$%%#!" Freddie cursed as pulled into an alleyway, narrowly dodging explosions in his wake. He armed and deployed his anti-tire spikes in the alley, noting that innocent civilians were unlikely to actually come across them in such a secluded area. Another car in pursuit was disabled, but the five remaining were pretty bright unfortunately and drove on alternate routes and from the GPS map Spencer was displaying, would easily cut Freddie off at the next exit.

"What did you say to me?!" Sam's voice brought Freddie back to another predicament at hand.

"Nothing, ummm Sam I am in kinda a rush. What do you need?" Freddie needed to think fast. He couldn't outrun them… by land, and quickly dialed into the navigator a query for the nearest river. The XL-5000 had aquatic capabilities and Freddie could get away via boat.

"Just that you need to sign the lease forms, and we haven't even begun discussing how to split the rent with Jake and Gibby. Are you driving right now?"

_Right… Me, Sam, Gibby, and… Jake Krandal all are trying to get an apartment in Seattle together. The lease is due that soon? Whoa! Fire missles! Fire missles!_

Freddie destroyed an obstructing construction barrier and entered the road being repaired, his pursuers in… well hot pursuit.

"Yes, and the traffic is ridiculous. So the lease is due… tomorrow?" Freddie's mind was whirling from the overload of things to concentrate on.

"Fredward, don't be one of those janks that drive while on a cellphone. I hate those people. I mean they are controlling a half-ton vehicle and they have the nerve to divert their attention elsewhere?! Pull over and finish the conversation at least."

"Definitely can't at the moment! I… won't be able to make it back to discuss the leases otherwise! River is almost here!"

"I know that winter is almost here. Hence the lease needs to be signed. Freddie, you've been so out of it lately. Don't you care?"

"Yes! Just dealing with things!" Freddie flashed his rear lights at an intensity he measured to be equal to the sun in the sky. Two blinded drivers crashed their cars into each other creating a roaring explosion.

"Freddie, I just hope you know how much it would suck to lose this lease after looking for a place for so damn long," Sam then said in a slightly softer voice, "I was kind of looking forward to this too."

"What did you say?!" Freddie's ears were still roaring from the last explosion.

"Forget it already. You've been so absent-minded lately you know?" Sam's irritation was clear in her words.

"No, it's just that my surroundings…" Freddie flinched as some machine gun fire just totaled his left side-view mirror, "are really noisy!"

"You know, it feels like you just haven't been listening to me lately. I barely can get a call through, and all my emails must look like spam to you."

"That's a misunderstanding!"

_A few more miles… almost there…_

"Are you even taking me seriously?"

"Yes Sam, I've always taken you seriously…"

"Take cover immediately!" Spencer's voice blared loud and clear with a warning and Freddie thrust his head as low as possible as an explosion tore off the roof of the car, the shockwave knocking the phone on the ground.

"Freddie? Benson? Hello?" Freddie swerved his car frantically and knocked two more cars off the road while grasping for his pearPhone. He finally grasped it.

"Hey Sam, I'm sorry. What were we talking about again?" Freddie could see the bridge now. Freedom was within grasp.

"Forget it Freddie. Just get your rear back here as fast as you can… Dorkface" Sam then hung up on Freddie before he could even reply.

"Situation looks dire," commented Spencer as Freddie looked up. Two of the pursuit cars were blocking the path to the bridge and Freddie knew he still had one on his tail as well. Freddie stared sadly back at his phone before commenting, "Things don't look good here either."

He slammed the accelerator and fired one more missile in between the two blocking cars slamming them apart and clearing a path. Freddie quickly drove off the bridge into the river and activated the boat transformation sequence and started pulling away at speedboat speeds with his opposition staring in frustration from the shore.

_How do I get myself into these predicaments?_

A/N: Yes, the name is ridiculous, please read and review. And special thanks to my sister for proofreading, even though she thought Freddie's car was so American being designated Extra Large 5000… girls.


	2. Chp 1: Pieces of Sanity

**iSpy 00Seddie**

**Chapter 1: Pieces of Sanity**

_On the USS Maine submarine in the Baltic Sea:_

"Heard you had a close call in Chopin," commented Colonel Morgan. He was currently the commanding officer aboard the USS Maine submarine, which Freddie had rendezvoused with as soon as he was evacuated from Poland. Freddie noted sadly that Colonel Morgan was also a friend of Carly's father in the military, and in particular had doted on Carly as if she were a favorite niece. Some memories could wait till morning, right now Freddie was exhausted and still in quite a bit of pain. Shrapnel had a way of getting in places you didn't even you know you had.

"Yeah, Intelligence screwed up royally, and I have heaps of paperwork to file now." Freddie wanted nothing more than to return to his room and rest and maybe even think of possible apologies to Sam. She was the last piece of sanity he had, and it was moments like this that Freddie remembered just how important such pieces were. He looked at Colonel Morgan who seemed to be looking at some point over his shoulder.

"Have you heard from Carly?" It was an expected question. Freddie had seen this coming, but it didn't stop him from delaying an answer he already had at the tip of his tongue.

"Not since Sam's birthday, and even then it was only an eCard. Carly has been a little secluded since… you know." Freddie purposely left the sentence unfinished. People said time heals all wounds, but Freddie suspected that was a euphuism based on how he felt now.

"Did you trace the email?" Colonel Morgan knew Freddie's capabilities as well as Freddie's own superiors. Maybe he felt responsible towards him, probably from guilt.

"Yup, internet café… in Mexico." Freddie really wanted this conversation to end, "I've got an air lift in 20 minutes, Colonel and I need to double-check my belongings."

"What about your car?" Colonel Morgan glanced at the severely damaged XL-5000. Freddie suspected it would be easier to build a whole new car then to repair that one, but Freddie was the sentimental type, and the car had definitely saved his life.

"I've upgraded Spencer lately. He'll handle the repairs given the proper equipment and assistance." Freddie was already walking in the other direction now. It didn't matter that he was already packed, Freddie always was organized. His mother had browbeaten that habit into him.

"Look Freddie, say hi to Sam for me, and if you ever need to talk…" Colonel Morgan called after him. Freddie felt a little guilty. Colonel Morgan was a good man, and didn't deserve the cold shoulder Freddie was giving him now. Freddie squashed that feeling and went into his room, put in some earphones and turned on his pearPod. He would have 20 minutes of tranquility at the least.

_Seattle, Washington in the Eastside Apartment Tower:_

"Okay so the total cost of the apartment is $8300 a month with water, internet, cable, but not electricity." Gibby noted off, "Four beds, two bathrooms, kitchen, and a balcony."

"Of course it has a balcony Gibby, it's an apartment." Sam cued in, "That is still $2075 for each of us. Are we okay with that?" Sam hated the fact that Freddie wasn't here. It was ironic really, since Freddie and Carly were always the responsible ones in the past and it was of course, Samantha Puckett now picking up the slack it seemed. Freddie never seemed to be around anymore, not to mention when he was here he slept like the dead, and Carly had abandoned her a long time ago. Sam didn't even care what she was doing or how she was. It was Freddie that had the brilliant idea of saving money by rooming with some old "friends" from high school that still worked in the city. Sam was still dubious that they could keep up their side of the bills, but Freddie assured her that this change would be good for everyone.

_Except the crazy idiot decided to never be around to follow through on his idea._

"Hey Sam, $2075 is no small sum. What does Freddie even do nowadays?" asked Jake. He was by far the queerest addition to the group. Freddie loathed the guy all through high school, and not just because Carly had a thing for him. Sam suspected it was simply because the guy was what Freddie wanted to be at the time: popularity, coolness, strength, charisma. Freddie never did explain his motive behind getting Jake Krandel to join in.

"I don't know exactly. I think he's a software consultant. You know, one of those geek squad people that gets sent around showing customers how to use the software they buy." Sam paused for a second before adding, "At least that's what he tells me. Freddie always ends up sleeping all day when he gets back from trips, and there were a few incidences when he'd come back hurt. I thought the guy would finally escape bullying."

"What, from you?" added Gibby playfully, which earned one of the sofa cushions being throw emphatically at his face by Sam. It had been well-known that Sam and Freddie would constantly bicker back during their school days. It had been just as well-known that Sam had always won. Course that stopped when the Shays were totally screwed by fate, and Carly had run off to be with her father, even though he was still on naval duty. Sam and Freddie were totally left with nothing. iCarly was no more, and the unstoppable triumvirate had been broken. It was suddenly a totally different world. Sam and Freddie kind of just drifted along. They had even stopped fighting for the most part. It wasn't the same carefree world anymore, and to be honest Sam suspected that each one was afraid the other would shatter and break if pushed too hard.

"You guys talking about me?" Freddie walked in the door to their hopefully soon to be apartment. Everyone looked up at once, and Sam in particular noticed that Freddie was favoring his left leg. It was well-hidden but Sam knew.

"Yeah, we were discussing pay, and you're just in time." Jake chimed in. Freddie gave him an uncomfortable look for a nigh unnoticeable split second before smiling back.

"Well, how big is the hole in our wallets going to be?"

_Onboard the USS Seawolf:_

"Captain Shay, you're needed on the bridge." An announcement appeared over the intercom, interrupting the old captain from his planned nap in the quarters. Reluctantly the captain dressed and made his way to his command post on the USS Seawolf, a submarine he had served for the last 10 years. Sometimes he questioned whether his country was worth it. All soldiers made sacrifices, he was told, but he had lost a son that he should have gotten to know better and had to watch his daughter slowly destroy herself in grief. Sadly, it seemed that Carly always seemed to do better when she was away from him as she was now. Only the occasional letter and email letting him know of her safety. He had no idea where she was now.

Colonel Morgan was waiting for him. Captain Shay reminded himself that Colonel Morgan was the current U.S. liaison to Amalgam, the newest and most powerful private military in the world. Famous for being the new international front on terrorism, the group had proven themselves incredibly effective in their 5 short years of life. When the United States found themselves too battered to carry the battle, Amalgam quickly stepped into the midst and seemingly did the job for them. The group was suspiciously secret, all main bases were placed in unknown locations, and their technology was 5 years ahead of everyone else. The only redeeming factor was that as a private military, their favor could be bought and the no one else tried harder than the U.S. of A. The U.S. military got all of Amalgam's hand-me-downs first and Amalgam tried a little harder to win battles in the Middle East.

Captain Shay was appreciative of their work, but he could never like them. These were trained professionals who killed for money, not patriotism, not even for loyalty and camaraderie, just money. He could not see a future for them once the war on terror was won, and Amalgam definitely seemed to be winning. As a company that hired from all around the globe, their leadership and management had an uncanny ability to find connections everywhere and they functioned disturbingly well as a cohesive unit around the globe.

_Keep your enemies close and your friends closer_

That must be what Colonel Morgan was here for, his report on Amalgam. The two old friends shook hands and Colonel Morgan opened with what he thought would be most relevant to the captain.

"I saw Fredward Benson the other day, the poor kid is still working himself to death."

_Ah yes, "Freddie" as Carly called him. Considering how close Carly was to the boy, I still feel ashamed that I never met the kid._

"Did he mention…"

"He said, the last he heard, Carly was in Mexico, alive and well." Apparently Colonel Morgan knows him too well.

"Terrific, she's not even in the country." He had let Carly live her own life, and he would forever wonder if that was the right decision.

"You did the right thing. She was restricted and confined here. Anyway, I also have more pressing matters to discuss. The CIA has recently captured a mole among their ranks. I think that he may be related to case S59 that Benson created 3 years ago."

"Yes, the case that Benson had forwarded to me without authorization because he thought it was just. He's a good egg, but I thought case S59 was closed a year ago."

"Indeed, but this may reopen it. Amalgam has already requested transfer of the prisoner, but I pulled some strings and I think I can get you and Freddie a first go at him. I think Amalgam is still flabbergasted that the CIA actually did something competent."

"Thank you, Roger. I had no idea you could do that."

"I just hope it helps Fredward sleep at night. Heaven knows he needs it."

_Seattle, Washington at Galini's Pie Shop:_

It was an amazing fact that Sam and Freddie still ate here. One would think the memories too difficult, but at some point Sam had suddenly declared her need for Galini's cream pie, probably to act as comfort food, but Freddie at the time couldn't have agreed more with her. Though at the moment, he was in a corner of the shop watching Sam eat her pie and then his pie (some things never change) as he was stuck on the phone with his mother.

"Yes, mom, I'm fine and I'm back safe and sound."

_I think being in one-piece is technically fine, right?_

"Yes, I remembered my anti-bacterial hand lotion."

"I know, danger's always around the corner, I'm aware."

_Probably better than even you do, Mom_

"Yes, I drove home. It was a rough drive, but I managed. Thank wonders for GPS."

_And for bulletproof glass, aquatically capable cars, and friendly Artificial Intelligence_

"Mom, I'm with Sam right now, can we do this later?"

"Yes, she's fine and the same as ever."

"Yes, she's still single. Anyway, got to go."

_Mom never did learn the art of subtlety…_

Freddie turned back toward the blonde in his company and gave a shrug, and Sam responded with a knowing roll of the eyes. Her opinion towards Mrs. Benson had softened over the years, but she still thought the woman was crazy. Sam had really blossomed into one of the loveliest women Freddie knew over the years. He suspected that the loss of Carly affected Sam in more ways than one, and her sudden need to be fashion forward was a nostalgic plea for Carly to come home.

Though despite many assumptions, especially during college where the two were hardly separated from each other, he and Sam had always remained platonic. It was unspoken agreement really, like an invisible line was drawn. It was for the good of both of them. Their friendship was really all they had left, it couldn't be risked. It's like betting the planet's existence in a rock, paper, scissors match for better weather. It couldn't be done, and now the thought rarely occurred to Freddie. He could stand here unbiased and comment on how Sam was the most beautiful woman in the store hands down and feel nothing but pride towards his friend.

"So how was Gibby and Jake?" Freddie asked. Sam groaned in response, and actually looked up from her unfinished pie.

_Ick… That bad._

"Gibby's going back to acting school. He's got a few roles now, but between school and Gibby being Gibby, I really can't see him making the bills every month. As for Jake… He's okay. Can you believe he's an underwear model now?" Sam raised her eyebrows. Freddie found his eyebrows perfectly grounded.

"I'd just heard he was a model. I didn't know…"

"That he promotes the very underwear that you are currently wearing…"

"Ugggg, it sounds horrible when you put it that way," and Sam giggled. "Besides Gibby's an old friend. I'm sure everything will be fine." Sam looked down on her now empty plate.

"You keep saying that, and yet you're never home to back up any of it."

"Sam, this is my job. I mean, I travel a lot." Sam just stared at him, and didn't say anything.

_She knows I'm hiding something, and she's just waiting for me to cave…_

Freddie straightened his right leg, even though it still ached immensely, and ordered some more pie. Then he heard his cellphone ring once more, but with a ringtone he reserved for "special work." Freddie excused himself again, Sam looking irritated and Freddie feeling guilty as he returned to the corner.

"Yes, what's the situation?"

"This is Captain Shay. I think you need to come down and see this Fredward."

A/N: Ack, backstory, always so slow and boring, but its hard to do over-encompassing plots without them. I wonder how the Bond and Terminator movies always seem to be able to do on the fly.


End file.
